We Are Free Men

ahh the wonderous feeling of being ungrounded after being on 'house arrest' for soo long!
my thoughts on the weekend past:

thank god linda and nelly are back from florida and oh damn them for getting me way too plastered for my own good

hooray for country kitchen fun that i have missed for two or three months now... oh its such my savior

steve is amazing in every which way possible, not too mention his knowledge and how broad it is. thank you lord for showing my expectations were lower and he prevails with all of his well rounded knowledge and odd dirty jokes... and spit. haha --although i will admit there is way more to him than that, so much more i could go on, but chose not to, not at this point any ways. ---oh, and being with him sure does put me in a different world, a new one, one that i had no idea exists and if its alright i'd kinda like to stay there forever.

enlight of all my weekend fun, monday came, like it always does --err, and i was presented with a job opportunity that im pretty sure im going to take. i will be doing data work for paul whitlow getting paid 7 bucks an hour, which sounds pretty damn good to me. that work would suit me untill i made it out of cosmetology school, which i have to start sometime this fall before procrastination gets the best of me and i happen to be stuck at a high school diploma required job for the rest of my life, which would certainly not suit me.


i'll leave you with this interesting quote i found today 'why take diet pills when you can enjoy ayds' --you should look into watching that commercial that was so strategically made in 1982 :)

The Good Times Are Killing Me

What FLCL Character Are You?


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fun huh?

oh and i got ungrounded today! (off house arrest as steve likes to say) --6 days early! hell yes!

Jetsabel Removes The Undesirables

karma may have been in my favor this time.
yesterday i went to steves during lunch... although i also skipped 5th hour. so i atleast got about two hours with him yesterday, which was amazing. although im not so sure i will be able to have sex with him as often as i would like, and certain not as often as he would like... his peircings get to me.. he took the P.A. out 2 weeks ago, and it was a considerable difference --that thing was viscious-- we thought the frenoms would be alright, but to mine and most likely his dismay, the frenoms even cause a problem with me. im not exactly sure what it is they do to me, all i know is the aftermath is slight bleeding, and pain. my guess would be they are scraping me. im not really sure what it is, all i know is that its extremely uncomfortable, and there are four of them.

he already had a difficult time with taking the P.A. out because he really liked it... it wasn't so much something he really wanted to do, but he did. and even before i knew i had problems with the frenoms he said that if i did we most likely wouldnt be able to have sex because those were something he probably wouldnt ever take out unless he was getting married, and he figured by then the girl would be used to them and he wouldnt have to worry of such things. as well as i would hate to make him take them out because he has had them for so long and seems attached to them (haha)... i dont know though, i cant keep putting my poor body through that, at least not often.

so that is my recent woe... silly huh?

Make War

oh christy and her terrible games. and damn me for tell him he should let her know. she didnt need to know, not really. now i have caused a problem with the one thing in the world i NEVER wanted to cause a problem with... good job on that one sonja...

well im now 100 percent sure that steve cares about me alot... if there was a moment i doubted that, damn do i feel shitty... not that i don't already.

although i did accomplish a goal last night :) ... my goal when me and steve started seeing each other was to hear him sing, because he assured me he is a horrible singer and he only sings to his daughter. because im just that cool i heard him sing last night, of course they were cute children's songs, because his daughter was singing them - which was adorable ... goal accomplished. now i must think of a new goal in the way of steve... hmm...

on slightly less important note- chris seems to be hating me at the moment... did i do something? im pretty sure thats a no.

im just more so longing for the 18th, well more so the 20th. school will finally be done for me -oh graduation- as well as i will then become ungrounded, and i have an even stronger longing to see steve, whom i haven't the pleasure of seeing since last thursday during lunch :) . i understand that wasnt too terribly long ago, but alas it was only an hour, and that doesn't satisfy the amount of time i am wishing i was spending with him. of course when schedules permit.

-christys' favorite past time is to make war- poor steve

hes a bastard... and i wish i had the balls to get him fired.

A Line Allows Completeion, A Circle Does Not

...so my past month in a nutshell...
well march 30th, my mom confronted me with my 'cocaine addiction' she called it, and gave me 2 choices 1) go to rehab and get better 2) be grounded until i move out and they sell my car oh and 'end up in jail' how she put it
i chose rehab, so i had to quit my job, stop going to school for a little bit and travel up to jefferson city to do what was supposed to be a 21 day recovery program on april 5th. althought i only ended up spending 36 hours in there, which doesnt seem like very long at all, especially apposed to 21 days, trust me, the 36 hours was more than enough... it was incredibly unneeded... so i came home late night on the 6th and didnt return to school until the 20th. i have somehow managed to get all my grades, well higher than F's so i can atleast graduate. --moral of the story: drugs are bad, and thats the last time i ever get near them being clean and having the people that i care about and care about me is much more amazing than anything---

in other news steve is amazing... so when he found out i was doing coke he stopped talking to me...incredibly understandable, i dont blame him. so when i got home from rehab we started talking again, the first conversation went something like : 'i started talking to amy again and realized that i didnt want to be with her and it just felt wrong, and i have thought alot about you and so on and so forth, and i want to do this, out in the open and everything.' so all in all it was the greatest thing i had been waiting to hear. things went from there and we got to the point where we were talking an average of 5 hours a day, and calling eachtoher an average of 4 times a day... we went camping a few weekends ago and pretty much stayed in bed the whole time, except for the few hours when stacy and josh showed up, we all decided to pow-wow in her tent and drink, until i ended up drinking a little too much and getting sick.. ALOT, but after that i felt better and other than the rain and the heat and nature it was amazing, just the fact that i got to see him and we got to be together and all that other girly mushy stuff. --oh and were with eachtoher now, which i am hoping lasts a long long time, although no one ever really knows how things are going to turn out, you just have to let me flow...--

i could say so much more about steve, but my fingers would get exhausted from typing and my sentences would more than likely do a bunch of running into eachother, with not a lot of sense made... i have already talked to steve twice today... he might call later.. ha :)
--he makes me so goddamn happy--


"sonja, what's wrong with you? you're acting like some kind of giddy girl... that's not you! this guy must be really amazing to make you act like this. haha." --jake.